Monday, September 27, 2010

Who Does It Like Me: I KEEP ASKING MYSELF

Who Does It Like Me: I KEEP ASKING MYSELF: "I'm trying to last. Waiting to see how long it's gonna be before I have a physical, mental, AND emotional break-down. Expecting the worst..."

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I KEEP ASKING MYSELF

I'm trying to last.
Waiting to see how long it's gonna be before I have a physical, mental, AND emotional break-down.

Expecting the worst.

Just SO SURE that happiness is NOT for me.

Wondering when is the next horrible thing coming MY way && will that next one be the ONE.
The one to take it outta me.
All my AMBITION, LOVE && COMPASSION...
GONE
...!!!!
I can barely shed a tear because I'm dried out.

I don't know fun any more, I don't know feelings any more, at least not the good ones.-


What I do know...What I DO know is...

HURT, PAIN, STRESS, AGGRAVATION, ANGER, NEGATIVE TEMPTATION, DRINKING && LET DOWNS
...etc.

I can't do it any more, I'm scared of bad news && terrified of pain.
What will I do...?...Is it ALL because of me...?...What am I not doing right...?...Am I not pushing hard enough or am I pushing TOO much...?...What's my destiny...?...(UUUUUUgggggHHHHH) I hate asking myself these questions but is this where it ends...?...
WITH NO ANSWERS...?